I'm sitting in the cold and drafty 'dungeon' office and with twice as much work to do as is humanly possible by one soul and I'm asking why I'm am pondering the total unfairness of life in general?
It's like a series of cross roads, life, Nay! it's a dark maze!
Life...take the wrong turn and it sets a rotten pattern that's hard to change. I got to thinking about what if's...What if I had said no instead of yes or vice versa, what if I had worked harder or had different principles, stronger ones, or maybe less strong ones?
I play the time travel game in my head a lot lately. Mulling over where it would be best to return to in time and this start again and this time get it 'right' whatever that is.
Trouble is go too far back and it's Wham! no kids who by and large have been a joy and a source of comfort and friendshipt to me..and of course if I went that far back, by default, there would also be no grandchildren...no! that's no good then
So the pre-marriage, young and free me era would have to be ruled out then
Mmmm in that case it would have to be before the second marriage..but wait! that's no good either..that rules out a lot of very good friendships made in the last 18 years, not to mention O/H no.2 himself! Oh dear it's all too much to think about and what's this to do with Sanctuary news ? Well it's all about me I suppose and the dreaded Winter months ahead of struggling physically and financially and all the dratted self denial of basic things most other women take for granted as their right ( hairdressers/make up/ lie-ins et al )
I give up so much for these horses, for this charity...I must be getting old, I'm feeling it's almost time to turn the clock back...or forward